There I was riding around my subdivision when I happened upon a dragon. It was a real one. Actually, it was the first dragon that I have personally confronted in my long life of vigilance. Now, I have several dragons in my home. In fact, one dragon sits on guard at my desk where I am writing this essay.

Additionally, my two grandchildren, Jack and Owen, and I play dragon weekly in Indy while I babysit. One of us will chase the other two around the park while roaring ferociously like a dragon.

However, the dragon that I confronted was not either a wooden carving or a fun game. This dragon was clearly an evil dragon who was out for no good. I attempted to talk to the dragon about his behavior and thinking errors. It was not long before we got into a long discussion about American politics, especially regarding the 2016 presidential race. The dragon kept mentioning his favorites like Huckabee, Cruz, Trump, and more than a dozen more favorites.

On and on went the dragon as if he had the faintest notion about any serious issue facing America today. In addition, I mentioned that neither did any of his favorites. I told him that anyone like Clinton, Warren, or Saunders would be better than anyone of his favorites would be. Well, that statement rattled the dragon. He attacked me.

This is St. George slaying a dragon.

I chose this stained glass window not because St. George and I look similar, but the dragon that I fought looked very much like this dragon as related to size and color variation. Without going over the entire battle, let it be said that I slew the dragon after about a two-hour struggle. Okay, you do not need to applaud any longer.

While I did risk my life, my victory came at some personal cost to me. In the midst of the battle with the dragon, he bit my nose with his mighty jaws. In spite of the pain, I continued to lay the dragon low with several fatal blows. My noble quest was to defend my nose and neighborhood.

After disposing of the dragon, I drove to St. Mary Medical Center in Hobart, which interestingly was where Dr. Kaakaji saved my life seven years ago after I fell off a ladder causing a subdural hematoma or more commonly known as a traumatic brain injury.

When I got to the emergency room, they quickly took me into their trauma center where Dr. Honore and Nurse Castelli cared for me. They asked the normal questions about what had happened. I recounted the story of the dragon. Both the doctor and nurse said that it looked more like a dog bite to them. Both of them questioned whether I merely was making a mistake about the type of animal that attacked me. However, I was quite clear that it was a rather large dragon and not a mere little dog.

Therefore, both Dr. Honore and Nurse Castelli did not want to waste any more time discussing the type of animal that mauled my nose but treated me for "multiple lacerations" on my nose and face. Then Dr. Honore consulted his colleague, Dr. Malczewski, a plastic surgeon. After telling me of the recommendations of the plastic surgeon, he cleaned me up, started me on antibiotics, and told me to be at Dr. Malczewski's office first thing the next day. This is a photo of me just leaving the hospital.

The first thing the next day I was sitting Dr. Malczewski's office. You can imagine the number of queries that I got from other patients in the waiting room. When they asked about what had happened, I told them about the dragon attack. Soon Dr. Malczewski called me into an examining room. He too asked what had happened. He looked askance at me when I talked about my run in with the dragon. He said that he thought it looked more like a dog bite, as Dr. Honore thought. I assured him that it was a rather large dragon.

Dr. Malczewski relented, but he wanted to wait until the next day before he would deal with the lacerations to my nose. He gave me a very logical reason for the delay of a day having to do with dogs and infections. I assume that he was drawing parallels between what would happen with dog bites and dragon bites.

Early the following day, they prepped me for an operation under a general anesthetic, which I appreciated. I do not think that I would have liked to been awake during the surgery, even though I was out of surgery in less than an hour.

Dr. Malczewski gave me instructions, which included returning to his office and having Lily Sanchez, his cosmetic coordinator, remove the stitches in three days. Early Monday morning, there I was at his office where Lily removed the stitches. She was very pleasant, like the rest of the doctors and nurses that treated me. However, she seemed to believe me that it was a dragon that bit me not merely a dog.

One closing comment, between the evening in the emergency room and the day of the surgery, I went to Indy to see Jack and Owen. Naturally, with all the bandages, they wanted to know what had happened. I told them about the dragon. Jack, who will be five in a couple of days, questioned me about the dragon account. However, Owen, who will be three in a couple days, accepted the dragon narrative. Owen and Lily are the only ones that do not question me.

PS If you have any medical needs whether related to dragons or anything else, I would suggest going to St. Mary Medical Center, Hobart, IN. If you go to the emergency room, look for Dr. Honore and Nurse Castelli. If you need plastic surgery, see Dr. Malczewski there also. You will meet Lily who is most understanding.

06/12/15