I wrote an essay a couple of years ago, Two Crazy Captains Chasing Moby Dick, in which I referenced the parallels that David Axelrod saw between Rudy Giuliani and Captain Ahab chasing Moby Dick. Axelrod’s metaphor was that Giuliani chased Obama like Ahab chased the great white whale. Giuliani and the political right sought to destroy their political nemesis, President Obama. My essay was an attempt to dis Captain Rudy. Looking back upon that essay, while it was factually accurate, it pales in comparison to the incarnation of Captain Ahab into Captain Donald the Dumb. Herman Melville's Moby Dick fascinated millions of readers since it was published over a hundred and fifty years ago. Nonetheless, the parallels between Captain Ahab and Donald the Dumb are also fascinating.

The search for the great white whale

Captain Ahab pursued the illusive great white whale around the world. In the process, he lost his leg in an encounter with Moby Dick. To haunt the mad captain beyond the loss of his lost leg was that it was replaced by a prosthesis…made from a whale bone. Ahab must walk the deck of Pequod looking for his arch enemy, the great whale, walking on a peg leg made from a whale bone.

Ahab is looking for Moby Dick with his peg leg from a whale.

Ahab walked the deck of the Pequod until one day when Moby Dick was spotted. After years of searching the seas, the long-awaited confrontation was moments away.

The chase begins.

"...to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee."

Moby Dick and Captains Ahab and Rudy pale in comparison to the present-day metaphor of another Ahab. Enter Rudy’s successor who will chase the illusive Moby Dick, President Obama. While Captain Rudy failed, Captain Donald the Dumb is sure of success…or is he?

Captain Ahab

Captain Ahab’s incarnation

There are many parallels between the first Ahab and this present-day Ahab. Both entered working in life early. Ahab married a nice young gal and Captain Donald the Dumb married three nice young gals over his life. Ivana was roughly his age. Marla was nearly twenty years his junior. Melania was nearly twenty-five years his junior. In addition, a long list of other encounters with nice young gals occurred during the recent Captain Ahab’s life. They are all waiting to be prosecuted by Donald the Dumb for lying.

The present-day Ahab can’t stand dealing with a successful black person who also was a successful president. The archetypal example of Donald the Dumb’s jealousy of Obama is the Affordable Care Act or better known as Obamacare.

Donald the Dumb hates being dissed by anyone, not just a black president. For example, Sen. John McCain voted to uphold Obamacare, which sent our fake president into a fury. Nonetheless, McCain stood up to Donald the Dumb and stuck his finger into our fake president’s face by voting no on Donald the Dumb’s dissing of Obamacare. However, that was only the beginning.

McCain was suffering from a brain tumor that would soon take his life. When he died, McCain didn’t want Donald the Dumb at his funeral and had President Obama speak at it. Hell has no fury like the present-day Ahab, Donald the Dumb.

Ishmael, the narrator of Moby Dick, states another interesting parallel between the Old Testament Ahab, the king of Israel. Ishmael responds, “When that wicked king was slain, the dogs, did they not lick his blood?”

Last week, America observed the passing of President George W. Bush. Surely, Donald the Dumb must know that his own clock is ticking. That was obvious. What wasn’t was whether when he dies will anyone or any dog care?